When I was getting ready to be married, one of my friends told me of all the loot that he and his wife received as wedding gifts. He recounted gift by gift the bounteous haul he made. “My grandma gave us a television, my uncles pitched in to get us a bbq grill, her parents gave us all of our china, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.” Wow, that was the point that I really got excited about the wedding guest list. . I had always just given my friends a waffle iron and he was talking about all of these great gifts he had received. Invite Everyone!! I exclaimed to Jen (my fiancé). I would gladly stand in a line for three hours to get more loot. I had always just given my friends a cheap toaster, and he was talking about all of these great gifts he got. I was mostly kidding, but the idea of all those gifts was appealing.
The day came and went and we did make a glorious haul. House décor, a bbq grill (from my friend and his family) a bunch of cash and there were three or four cheap toasters. As I was counting my riches, my wife came to me with a couple of pens and a stack of Thank You cards. NOOoooo! I had done the math, but I hadn’t calculated everything that I would pay for all of the gifts. The thank you notes took us hours, but I was glad we did it.
When you receive a nice gift, it deserves a genuine show of appreciation. Which leads me to the question, “Is it bad ettiqutte to send email thank you notes for wedding gifts received?” ABSOLUTELY! When someone gives you a nice gift, they should receive a hand written expression of your gratitude in return. An email is not appropriate. Withholding a gracious thank you is rude and unacceptable. As I tell my kids now, if you don’t appreciate what you get, I will just take it and give it to someone who will appreciate it. Showing gratitude is a form of appreciation. If you can’t take three minutes and send a hand written thank you to the people who spent their money and love on a gift for you, maybe I should take it away and give it to someone who will appreciate it!
So when is emailing a thank you appropriate in the wedding world. Here’s an idea. Send a thank you email card to everyone who attended the reception. Ask for people to sign the guest book with their email addresses. Then load some fresh pictures from the reception into your account at MyInvitaitonLink.com and send it out to everyone who came. Your thank you email can be full of pictures and expressions of love and gratitude for their support. They will love to see the pictures of the reception and honeymoon. Make sure you recall the highlights, the toast, the first dance, the cake, the decorated car, the first kiss as husband and wife, the wedding party and more. They will be delighted and moved to see and feel the emotion of the event that they were lucky enough to attend. But make sure that everyone who gave you a gift receives a hand written thank you. Except for the toaster givers, they all deserve it.
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